Back in August last year, I replied to some of the ‘hate mail’ we received from our historic, and most popular fiction work on the site: The Legend of Dragoon April Fools Remake Spoof. Since then, the article has remained a popular fixture on our site, and we have made some new enemies, and perhaps, I should enter a witness protection program of sorts, as angry JRPG, Legend of Dragoon fans are probably hunting for me as we speak.
It seems that the passage of time has not alleviated the anger, and hatred directed at me (and Mont) for writing the spoof, mainly because some people did not realize that it was a parody interview with a non-existent director until it was too late, and they had fallen for the joke.
So, for the second time in less than 9 months, we have decided to make another mailbag featuring some of the most entertaining responses that we have received so far.
It Was a Poor Joke
The joke fell flat–Timothy
Sam Replies: Really? Damn! There goes my dream of being a successful stand-up comedian to the gutter. Really, that hurt my feelings, bro.
The Legend of Dragoon Did Not Try to Emulate Final Fantasy VII
So development for LoD started a year before ff7 was released. They were being developed around the same time, planning for ff7 started after 6 was released but development started late 95 and was released in 97. Development for LoD started in 96 but took 3 years so it’s release was later in 99/00. Ff7 fans are so annoying with this. The only reason they were compared to begin with was due to critics and ff being the big name in RPGs but RPGs have their similarities bc they’re RPGs it’s like saying every other rpg ripped ff off just bc it’s a rpg. Think of it like high fantasy genre, is every fantasy story a rip off of LOTR? No, fantasy stories will have similarities due to the genre but it doesn’t mean they rest of them can’t be their own.–Katie
Sam Replies: Katie, I will commend you for your response, as you did not threaten Mont, or myself, and it seems that you did your research while drawing your own educated conclusions about why LoD couldn’t have possibly copied FFVII.
While yes, LoD started its development in 96, as you clearly point out, the game spent three years in development, and two of those years were spent after Final Fantasy VII set the standard for most big budgets RPGs to follow.
Have some of the troupes utilized by FFVII (the dark brooding hero, the ‘holier than thou’ damsel that joins the party, the cool sexy heroine, the silver haired villain, etc.) been used by other JRPGs? Yes. But, it seems like The Legend of Dragoon went out of its way to feature all of these cliches in a single game, which wasn’t the game’s only problem, but it was something that critics noticed, and thus, the game’s average Metacritic scores were, in my opinion, deserving.
I would know; I was there. I played the game at around the same time that I played Chrono Cross and Final Fantasy IX (which also took inspiration from previous FFs), and LoD was, in my view, by far, the inferior title.
The game’s use of pre-rendered backgrounds with polygonal characters was taken straight from Square Enix’s (then known as simply Squaresoft) “How to make a JRPG 101” handbook. A handbook that was written by FFVII, no less.
The same can be said for the plot, though I will give LoD this: The game had a fascinating backstory to it all. Unfortunately, the writers sort of botched most of it in the actual game. But hey that’s what remakes are for? Right?
The Legend of Dragoon was influenced by Final Fantasy VII–there is no denying it. Many JRPGs after it were. Again, there is no shame in denying it.
*Editor’s Note from Mont Cessna: Everyone says how much they loved The Legend of Dragoon until they actually play it again.
I Know it is a Joke, but I like the Legend of Dragoon and You Disrespected Me and The Director
Yeah, I get that this is an April Fool’s joke, but it comes across as particularly mean-spirited. A lot of people, myself included, really enjoyed LoD and it brought a lot to the table. It was very ambitious in its scope, the original release required four disks to hold the whole campaign. LoD has a cult following and openly mocking the developers is just disrespectful.–Daniel
Sam Replies: I don’t know how I can “openly mock” a character created by my own imagination. Yes, Daniel, Masayuki Kasebe does not exist, he is as real as Santa Claus… or a white unicorn. Yasuyuki Hasebe, the game’s director, was never mentioned in the article, and I have no idea how he talks, or how he would address in real life any of the questions made on the fictional LoD Remake April Fools article, but if you want to feel disrespected, go ahead, feel free to do so at your leisure.
We will agree on one thing: The Legend of Dragoon was ambitious. However, utilizing that the game that was so “epically massive” that it needed four discs to hold the campaign is not a good argument for its greatness. Final Fantasy VIII also came in 4 discs (almost a year before The Legend of Dragoon did) so four ‘disks’ was not a groundbreaking achievement. Xenogears was a larger game, in terms of story scope and play time, and it came in two discs. Pre-rendered backgrounds, and CG scenes were storage-intensive, and that’s the reason why The Legend of Dragoon came packed onto four disks.
*Editor’s Note from Mont Cessna: “Laughs in Wing Commander IV for PS1.”
A Man Can Dream
I’m a legend of dragoon fan. I hope the remake will be even better as the original, hopefully on ps5 with the graphic display. a sequel would also be nice.
The story shouldn’t be straightforward. and offer more freedom in action, decisions to the player. The Producer and sony should not follow final fantasy. They should find their own new way and style. Be few steps forward against other RPG’s games. Have more Innovation and creativity. The game have big potential for few sequel parts and a remake. Sony should focus not about how many sold copies, instead about the quality, Story, excitement, fun, how to play the game. Give the game the soul what it needs and deserve.–Vahid
Sam Replies: Vahid, it seems that you managed to pinpoint most of the issues I had with the original game, even when you were trying to praise the original game by stating what the “sequel” or “remake” should fix.
While I would not hold my breath for Sony to ever Remake LoD with “PS5 Graphics”, as it would be a costly affair on an IP that might have lost them money 20 years ago, and only has 27,000 signatures in an old petition. A remaster can always be on the cards.
On to your list of improvements: “The Story shouldn’t be straight forward”. Indeed, my man, it should not.
While JRPGs in the 1990s (and even today) might be linear affairs, the genre (RPGs as a whole) has evolved. Jade Empire, KOTOR, Skyrim, and The Witcher 3 happened–we expect more out of our storytelling these days. Legend of Dragoon did not cut for me when I was in high school, and it would not cut it for me today 20 years later, unless it did something dramatic with the way that it told its story (a better translation perhaps?).
“They [I assume you are talking about the developers] should find their own way and style.” My big issue with the original The Legend of Dragoon is that it followed FFVII’s script too closely for my own liking, including the visual style and character design in certain spots. So yes, making something truly original would help.
“Be few steps forwards against other RPG’s games.” Given the money that was spent making the original, and the fact that it was not ahead of other contemporary games 20 years ago, I assume it would take a miracle for a The Legend of Dragoon remake to be “steps” ahead of the current crop of RPG games. But Tales of Arise didn’t have much innovation going for it (save for improvement in its combat), and I found it well worth my time.
Perhaps all we need is a better written Legend of Dragoon remaster, and that would suffice for most of the haters (which I guess I’m one). I did enjoy its combat, at the time.
The Legend of Dragoon is the GOAT, and Ocarina of Time is …Crap?
I read half of this before I realized it was bullshit, remove this shit click bait article. I’m assuming the writer thought this was funny because he dislikes LoD, but it’s funny because ocarina of time is an overrated pile of shit just fyi.–dead
Sam Replies: You have an odd username, dead, but to each its own. That said, sometimes people go to personal lengths in order to make their point. And boy! You know which buttons to push! Everybody knows that the The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time is not only my all-time favorite game of all time (yes, I am being redundant on purpose because Ocarina is that awesomely cool), but it is also, beyond a game, a spiritual sanctuary to me.
Heck, I even started a tattoo sleeve on my left arm about the game alone, just because my love for it will be a lifelong affair, and I will never, ever, be unfaithful to my beloved 1998 Nintendo masterpiece.
You know what I think is funny? The fact that you had to read half of the April Fools article before you realized that it was… a joke! Yes! Hilarious! I am laughing uncontrollably as I picture your confused visage while you read the article. And I couldn’t be happier about it!
Perhaps, given the information at hand, I shouldn’t judge you too harshly for your poor taste in gaming. Remember, you made it personal first!
*Editor’s Note from Mont Cessna: The author of this post must read a lot of Sam’s work to know Ocarina is his favorite game of all time.
The Most Anticipated Remake
Samuel Rivera – The Biggest Retard in History
Now that’s a remake I would play.–Cosmic
Sam Replies: Ah! Finally! A game made by *censored*, starring a *censored* protagonist, for *censored* to play! I am sure you are dying to play it, Cosmic!
It Hit the Spot!
Ah April Fools. You’re hitting a nerve now.–Grimm
Sam Replies: I know! It is my most successful literary work!
Take Me Seriously, I Exist!
Why even post jokes like this when we all know what people really want? Take the fans seriously, this is not funny.–Ian
Sam Replies: We know that the Legend of Dragoon cult is strong, and vocal… thus the whole point of the April Fool’s joke. Though I admit, this has gone far beyond what I thought possible for an article that used fake names, and funny references not a minute into the reading. But hey! Good times! Right? Right!?
*Editor’s Note from Mont Cessna: Between “AF-21” in the URL, the April 1st publish date, the fake director’s name, and calling LoD a Panzer Dragoon property should have been some pretty strong hints. I think you’re mad you let your excitement for a LoD remake cloud your judgement reading this, not what we actually wrote in jest, tbh.
Imagine a World Without Final Fantasy VII Remake…
I mean the angry emails were completely validated, people have been waiting a long time for this. Imagine if you had done this with FF7 when there was no remake coming, think how many MORE angry emails you’d have gotten…–xpurepkx
Sam Replies: You want the truth? I would very much welcome a world without Final Fantasy VII Remake… the original is better and its sequel under the guise of a remake is hilariously nonsensical. And yes… if we wouldn’t have gotten a FFVII “Remake” I would have written an April Fools piece about it. The pull to the dark side is too strong!
Go F*ck Yourselves
Literally go f*ck yourselves.
how many times will you delete my comments I wonder
go f*ck yourselves. food day jokes are supposed to be funny not make the person reading wish your company would burn to the ground–Hylian Hero
Sam Replies: So much anger! So much hate! So much cursing! We had edit the f*ck words a bit for our elementary school audience (which might answer your complaining about your colorful posts being deleted).
*Editor’s Note by Mont Cessna: His comments were stuck in Discus’s moderation queue for a few hours before I could publish them.
First, we did not make food jokes, unless you consider that LoD is some type of food, and if you do… seek help.
Either way, I thought (and still think) the joke was funny! Having you take the time to write in anger and wish for the “burning of our company” down to the ground is exactly the kind of reply that I dream about when I conceive April Fool’s jokes. Thank you for providing the chuckles!
Something You Shouldn’t Joke About
I don’t even know what this is but I must take the time to say…I am not shocked at the angry emails you’ve received. How stupid can you be? What a horrible thing to joke about.–Sol
Sam Replies: Out of all the comments we have received, this one is the most puzzling. There are things that should not be joked about, but a video game is not one of them (unless it is Ocarina of Time that is!).
Still, Sol, you admit that you have walked into something that you don’t understand (apparently you don’t know what The Legend of Dragoon is). So, you admit that you replied, and are calling someone ‘stupid’ over something that you know nothing about.
Either that, or you don’t know what an April Fool’s joke is? I don’t know. You comment is puzzling, maybe you are operating at a higher level of awareness that the rest of mere mortals. In a world full of terrible (genuinely horrific and tragic) events daily, what a horrible thing it is to joke about a video game… shame on me.
*Editor’s Note from Mont Cessna: Lol wut?
This Concludes This Edition of the Legend of Dragoon ‘Hate’ Mailbag
It has been a fun edition, and even though my replies might have sounded a bit ‘mean’ spirited, it is all in good fun. I appreciate everyone of our readers, the polite ones, and the ones that want to hunt me down for my heretic comments about The Legend of Dragoon’s greatness. I cannot wait for our third edition of this section!
*Editor’s Note from Mont Cessna: The Legend of Dragoon’s fanbase is always surprising me. The anger though is definitely palpable. Calm down! It’s just a joke. If anything, the April Fool’s article that these were in response to has helped generate more buzz and impetus for an eventual remaster or remake. This is satire, not something to lynch Sam for!
The Legend of Dragoon April Fools article that spawned all the hate
The 1st edition of this “Hate Mail” post with lots of different crazy comments and emails
Agree with the author? Couldn’t disagree more and are frothing at the mouth to tell him? Leave a comment here, on Facebook or send an email and make sure to follow Never Ending Realm on Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube!